Thursday, 9 February 2012

Starting over ... or

would you like a little cheese with this whine?  Baby steps, that is all I can do right now.  Between all the disruption in an otherwise dull, very routine little life, fighting a severe case of Bronchitis, sinus infection and of course Neighbour Bob, I believe I have suffered with a bout of depression.  The kind of feeling where there are no highs, no lows, just numbness.  The get up, go to work, deal with what you have to, only to go home flop on the couch, then wake up to go to bed.  Yup, that's been me for the past month.
The good news is, the days are getting longer (YEAH, lets hear it for Spring), I'm starting to feel better and I am seeking counselling with the Alzheimer Society on how to better deal with my dad's dementia.  Wow, what a learning curve this is and will be for quite some time.

What I am learning is that the caregiver HAS care for themselves without feeling guilty.  I actually took some time last weekend and went for a 2km walk.  Whoot!  It is a far cry from being Half Ironman ready, but it is a start.  Let's hope life will start to settle into a routine that all of us can live with.  I'm hoping to get to the pool tomorrow for some well deserved water and sauna therapy.

Who knows what 2012 has in store for me, but all I can do is embrace it and continue on.

"Twenty years from now you'll be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do.  So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbour.  Catch the trade winds in your sails.  Explore, Dream and Discover".  ~ Mark Twain

Life's fun if you don't weaken,

 Lily

14 comments:

Wes said...

{HUGS} spring is around the corner!

TNTcoach Ken said...

We won't remember any of this 20 years from now.... HA

Jo Lynn said...

I'm sorry you are suffering right now. I also wish I was closer so we could sit and talk over a warm cup of tea. Hang tough girl. Write me anytime. xoxoxoxo

Breandán said...

Listen, fair play to you. There are a lot like you suffering in silence. You are a great writer - always like your posts, so whenever you get a bit down it might give you a little lift to know that strangers like me get a lift from your talent and personality.

Xenia said...

Hugs, buddy. Take each day at a time and know you have a friend across the pond who is thinking about you. Take care.

kilax said...

Sorry to hear you are feeling this way, but happy you are brave enough to share it. Just doing that surely made you feel a bit better?

It's great that you are getting help to deal with your dad's dementia. I have had a few people with it in my life and not known what to do.

Hope things feel better soon! Keep talking to us!

ajh said...

Do take time for yourself. I haven't been following you long but you seem to be very thoughtful and wise. May it help you.

I love that Mark Twain quote. I have not seen it before.

Groover said...

Could be a little bit of Vitamin D deficiency, too. I'm sending some sunshine over your way...

Marlene said...

I'm glad you are starting to feel better. Please continue looking out for you! Enjoy the pool time, that should make you feel good! {HUGS} mama!

MrDaveyGie said...

Spring is coming, rebirth for a lot of us, and you persevere on this ‘hill’ you are on, because you’re an endurance athlete body and soul.

Black Knight said...

I hope you feel better soon. Don't give up and keep on running/biking/swimming.
All the best.
Sorry but I cannot send the sunshine because "sunny"(????) Italy is frozen and under a heavy snowfall.

Leana said...

Laurel, I'm so sorry to hear you are going through tough times. Lots of hugs your way.

Aka Alice said...

Ditto on all the ((hugs)) and positive thoughts. Taking care of a sick parent is just hard work. I'm glad someone gave you the advice that it's OK to take care of yourself!

I feel sorta silly tagging you in a silly meme, but I did. Maybe it'll make you smile and it'll be a little diversion? If not, no worries...

More ((hugs))

MarieA said...

I'e been offline and missed most of this,. for which I am sorry. Hang in there and point your face into the sun.... weak as it is.... it helps.
HUGS